How to Say No and Handle the User and the Parasite

Saying no is so damn hard to say. Being a negative word, it is always perceived a negative attitude to say it.
On business transactions, saying no is discouraged; for negotiators of the FBI, that word is a no-no.

For girls, saying no is kill joy, not charming or bitchy; for boys, it's anti-social, uncool!

But saying no when you mean it actually liberates you  from the pressures of the mainstream mold.
It's a brake to invasion of personal belief . It bestows you self-respect and self-worth.
However, some people are so adroit at leeching on others. Much more, they mastered the art of puting the guilt factor to their peers so as to force a selfish result at the expense of others.

Here are some difficult types of people and tips on how to manage them while maintaining your self-esteem and composure:

01 The Perpetual Borrower and the Devout Non-Payer

This person always have need problem be it money or things.
This is the spend spree type, an impulse buyer, the showy  and after the hype of his pretentious stance will come to you for help to you when depleted.

Get the habit of siezing up people's mind as they are about to approach you.

You can always tell when someone wants to borrow money before they speak.

One way, get lost.
Go somewhere, make yourself unavailable, or impossible to catch.

Two, make a story and say you are in a crunch even before he open his mouth. You just have to do it naturaly so as not to appear overtly apprehensive on his predicament.

Three, express your willingness to help, but explain you just can't for you have the same or even more problem.

02 The Helpless, Hopeless, Parasite

You will mistake this type as a pitiful weakling but in fact, this persistent trait to just rely on others proves that this personality is imposing. Persons like this are lazy, pathetic yet shrewd and just want to short cut things by means of others to provide for them. They are so persuasive that sometimes you'll cry your heart out hearing their  woes  and tragedies.

As always, read people's thinking to anticipate the scenario.

One, always rationalize the altruist in you, for this type feeds on your benevolonce.

Two, listen and empathize, then say you can't do it and suggest other persons that can help her plight.
Three, as he approches,be busy at something likle to be mad at someone on the phone, and be meddled preaching on your imaginary pulpit on how things should be avoided, done. The main thing is to set your mood at an unapproachable level.

03 The Self-Proclaimed Authoritative Schedule Freak

Dominant characters like this are hard to ignore,but don't fall on the trap.

One, when date is mentioned, let it be confirmed again and say like ,, hmm  that's also the time when you're at an important  appointment  the requires your availability nonetheless.

Two, tell him that a superior assigned a task for you on that day,, say your boss, or project manager much higher than her position.

Three, say you can't decide yet, but tell her better schedule it to others, you don't want her to rely on you only.
Four, explain some superstitious belief your family follow as a tradition that makes you impossible to attend on such date.

04 The Player

This person threats you that if you don't give the favor, it's a matter of life and death to her, or someone might not be very happy about it, putting you in an embarrassment forcing you awkwardly in a situation not to say no.

One, tell her that you are privy to the situation and its ok that you don't do it.

Two, just ignore and pretend you're too preoccupied on things you are doing... say fixing a computer that has the files you need to collate, analyze and report at the next hour.

Three, answer maybe, but don't promise, and carefully evaluate on how you can get off the ropes later.

05 The Blackmailer

A latent type of The Player and the most dangerous of all the specie mentioned. 

When confronted with this user, it's important not to respond immediately.
Never show any sign of resistance on the first instance, just let it flow until you can seize the situation.

Remember, the blackmailer, has some information that if dissappointed, may unveil things you don't want others to know.

So the first thing you have to do is to negotiate a longer time for you to decide, but in his back, plan your moves.

Second, give in a little if possible while work on to divert the issue or modify what he wants.

Third, trade in for other things that you might think are more valuable than her proposition.

While you do this, do your assignment and dig also on his personal records and pry for something that you might use against him. You can always find a thing or two if you just know where to look or ask.
Social media is your first base, friends and acquaintance and superiors next.

Finding your counter information, you now possess leverage in case of confrontation.

Let him know, what you have. Just let this be a defensive measure and not offensive so as not to aggravate things up.

Him knowing he's now also on the same compromise as he put you, will give him second thoughts to proceed or not. Most of the time these type are only gutsy on the surface  but are not tough enough when you know their weaknesses.

If possible, walk out of the situation or evade this person on your future dealings.

Saying no is also relative. It depends upon the person you talk to. 

If you feel like giving in, it's perfectly fine but if you have double thoughts then say what you mean.

A plain no without explanation works most of the time.

It does. 

Saying an absolute no, and get back to your work will make you mean sometimes but remember, you don't owe anybody an explanation especially if they are the ones asking you a favor.